Believe

So winter jam was pretty much, how the kids say, "off the hook!"
I don't know why I'm weird.
Anywho, I'm pretty much stoked for passion. It's going to be winter jam times a million. And that's like- a lot. lol

The only problem with me lately though, is that I'm very maliable and open to new ideas, etc. So since my religion teacher was teling us to look at everything intellectually, I did at winter jam.
I noticed how the guy speaking was pushy when asking for donations, I realized how easily influenced the crowd was, and then I noticed I wasn't enjoying myself as much as I should have been. Sitting next to me you'd never know this, because when skillet came on I acted like a maniac, but on the inside I really was thinking. lol
But on the other side of things, I noticed that I only paid ten bucks for a show that'd normally cost 60, and the donations were going to the next ten dollar show they MIGHT have down here if they raise enough.

There are a number of different sides to everything, and as humans, we obviously need to keep thinking intellectually so that we don't fall into random cults, or even follow the church mindlessly. We need to think about what we're doing, yes, but God also created (and I believe God created because everything is so intricately and perfectly put together on this earth that there's no way it was a random crash) anyway, God created our minds, yes, but He also created our hearts and souls. The parts of us that feel if we let them. The parts of us that take in a sunrise and feel the music booming to the beat of our soul.

Oh yes, think intellectually because there is an evil force in the world, but don't you dare stop believing what your heart knows to be true.

I should be doing homework.

So I absolutely hate my english class this semester.
Right now I should be working on an almost impossible paper that the four of us in my group (two of which are out of town) are supposed to finish by Tuesday.
We picked a theme that almost no one else has any opinion on.
I guess this is my giant.
If I don't do this, and then teach the homegroup lesson on Monday about "Facing our Giants" I will indubitably be a hypocrite.

P.S. I need more help on this blog thing.
Can you add friends? If so, how do you find them?
I can't blog stalk if I don't know how to find anyone, now can I?

Well, onto the paper.
Fun, fun, fun.

Pray for me?
=/

"For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there in the midst of them."

Random:
I totally looked up the word segway - GOOD thing because on dictionary.com it is described as a self-balancing personal transportation device with two wheels.
I found the proper spelling of the word I was actually looking for so I could say this:

Since I can't think of any proper segue into this...
My myspace name is leahpeah, and since it caught on so well, I figured I'd try and pick a new old nickname for my new blog.
Leahpeah was a teasing-like nickname from childhood friends, leahbeah is an endearing nickname given to me by my mother. =)
(I'm sure no one cares, but I figure you're supposed to introduce something when you create a blog for the first time...)

So now that you know why I chose my name, I chose my url because I love Stacie Gonzalez, currently known as IE because of the two Stacey/ie's in our homegroup.
IE helped me create my blog. Hence the url.
I'm a simpleton at heart, really.

Those who are in Mo's homegroup know this because they know me.
I had been praying for good close friends who were in the same stage of life that I wanted to be in, and although I didn't see it at first, God oh-so-greatly answered my prayer.

This place has grown to be a place of warmth, love and comfortableness (for lack of an existing word - sorry Stacey Laurel - aka Estacia! lol)

Today when I left that place, I felt hope again.
For so long I had given up on myself and those closest to me. I'd been on an "emotional rollercoaster" (for lack of a more unique phrase) ever since I saw what God wanted me to do. I'd get on fire to do it, then I'd get discouraged and fall.
I'd gotten so immune to this rollercoaster, that it no longer made me sick.
But opening up tonight, talking about things, knowing that someone will be there to encourage me when I need it, knowing that they WANT to be there, just fills my heart with joy.

I thought I was going to have to do so much on my own, so I'd suck it all up to myself and put a sweet little smile where tears were just minutes ago.
Tiring, but my belief was that this was just the burden I'd been given to deal with on my own.
Of course I suffered spiritually because of that belief - and spiritual affects all dimensions of the body.
No one is made to carry others around them spiritually. If that were the case, we'd have to worry, but we are not permitted that burden.
I had to first give my burden to God, and finally share the fact that I am weak with other humans who are just like me.

These friends are willing to cry with me, open up to me, and NEVER judge me.

Sure, I've had friends like that before, but these friends are different.
They're God-driven, and that makes the biggest difference in the world.

I told myself I had to do things alone, but there is a reason God created the church.
Although I'm a part of our great big church which will go out and do great big things, if I wasn't with this group of guys and girls, I'd be missing out on the soul of the church - the place God made to go and know that you've got people rooting for you.

Give your burdens to God, share your experience with friends.
Cry together, laugh together, even screw up together (just don't make that a habit lol) but most of all, pray together and share the Word of God.
Even if at first you don't think they're so much "your type", choose a circle friends that you can make God the center of, then wait...

love will show up in the midst of your pain.